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HUMOR
My Morning Routine Is 10x Better Than Yours
Implement these habits if you want to be more successful
My entire personality is defined by success.
I chase my goals like a lion pursuing its prey. That’s why I’m always efficient, motivated, and ready to go above and beyond to become the most inspirational person on social media.
It’s a scientific fact that nobody is more successful and productive than me. But if you adopt the following habits, it’ll be easier to get more done each day:
Sleep With An IV Drip, So You Don’t Waste Time Eating
According to a study by the US Government (the most reliable source of information to ever exist), the average person spends over an hour eating each day. But as you can probably tell, I’m not average. In fact, I actively go out of my way to avoid the habits of the mediocre majority.
That’s why I sleep with an IV drip. It provides my body with the necessary nutrients to function as a walking, talking, productivity machine.
Despite being the healthiest person on the planet, some people criticize my methods by saying that I’m unable to enjoy a delicious cheeseburger. That may be true. However, by sleeping with an IV drip, I’m…
